An Allegheny County shellacking, and a trip to Porkopolis.

 There are some things in this world that we can absolutely, 100% rely upon happening. Tomorrow, the sun will rise in the east, I-77 will still be under construction, and the Cleveland Browns will continue to lose at Heinz field where they are 1-20 since it opened. I think as an amateur sports journalist, I am entitled to one mulligan a year where I can fully lean into my hometown bias, ignore conventional wisdom, and make an outlandish prediction. Last year I picked the Browns to go to San Francisco and win 31-20, and all we did was go out there and lose 31-3 in a game that could have been 65-0. Like that prediction, this year I once again fell victim to the “Well who have they played?” analysis. But really, with such a huge advantage at QB and head coach, in retrospect, it was crazy to think that the Browns could catch the Steelers unprepared. It doesn’t even make sense to analyze the game all that much. Baker picked up right where he left off in the second half of the Colts game, and had ten completions and two interceptions. (That makes it 11 times in his career that Baker has a multi-interception game, and without googling, I am willing to bet that he leads the league in total picks since coming into the NFL in 2018) His very first pass attempt was returned for a touchdown, and just like that were down 10-0 six minutes into the game. That’s an all too familiar feeling, the Browns facing an insurmountable hill early in the game at Heinz field, and true to form we fell to pieces for the remainder of the game. We couldn’t run the ball, the passing game was anemic, and we couldn’t stop Pittsburgh’s ground game. In short, nothing was working and it looked like an extension to the second half of the Colts game. Sometimes it’s just not your day, and that was clearly the case last week.

Regardless, we do find ourselves at 4-2 so we can take some solace in that. However, Cleveland fans in general struggle with being happy human beings. There’s always something to pick apart, some negative mixed in among the good (like the one rotten pistachio mixed in with otherwise delicious nuts) The current maelstrom enveloping northern Ohio involves Baker, and his general mediocrity. (If he were a rock band, he would be Rush, a few good songs here and there, but not really an extended period of greatness. Or maybe he would be like Richard Russo who blew me away with Empire Falls, only to fizzle subsequently.) The concern about Baker is fair, because considering his career as a whole (36 starts) his numbers are best characterized as  “meh” (as the kids say). And soon enough the Browns have to make a decision about extending him to the tune of 30 million a year. So far, he is absolutely not the type of quarterback that we want to commit that much money to. Mary Kay Cabot wrote a great piece this week about exactly this issue, and the decisions the Browns face.* Baker is well aware that the current coach and GM are not the guys that made the decision to draft him, so he can’t really rely on loyalty in that manner. Kevin Stefanski and Andrew Berry are able to evaluate Baker more objectively and undoubtedly they’ve seen the same things we have. It does sound like they’re committed to giving Baker the remaining 10 games to prove himself worthy of that contract, but perhaps that is more of a function of elder statesman Case Keenum being the backup. We know everything there is to know about Keenum, although it is worth noting that he and Stefanski have history and a good rapport going back to their days in Minnesota. For Baker, it might be as simple as guiding this team to the playoffs to insure the extension from the Browns. It would be tough to cut ties with the QB that led a team to the playoffs for the first time since 2002

So strangely enough, the Browns and Baker Mayfield are going to be feeling a lot of pressure in Cincinnati tonight. The Bengals are not a great defensive team by any metric, and just a few weeks ago, the Browns put up 35 points while averaging six yards a carry. It’s funny that sometimes playing a bad team creates more pressure, but that’s clearly the case in the first half tonight. If the Browns scuffle on offense, and Baker throws another pick, I think that team could absolutely implode. We saw the temper tantrum last week from OBJ and I’m sure there’s already an undercurrent from the veterans on that team that maybe Baker isn’t the guy. This team is built to win now, and we can’t afford to keep trying to develop a quarterback and take the lumps that go with that. Terry Pluto wrote about exactly this thing, and I think (as usual) he’s right on the money. One thing for sure, if we win the coin toss, we sure as hell as better take the ball to start the game and get out to a lead right away. Like I said, the expectation when you play the Bengals is to score points, and I think Cleveland had better get out to a fast start immediately, and avoid a scenario where we are trailing on the road. 

Obviously no Chubb tonight is a huge loss, but Kareem Hunt will have plenty of opportunities for big plays and I predict a monster game from my guy Harrison Bryant. We might even see former Orlando Apollo superstar D’Ernest Johnson get a lot of work for the Browns tonight, he hasn’t gotten a lot of run since the Dallas game, but I feel like he’s a guy that stays ready, and will seize the opportunities he gets.  The Bengals are without amateur boxer Joe Mixon, but they do have AJ Green back who missed the first matchup against the Browns. Joe Burrow threw the ball 61 times against the Browns for 316 yards and 3 touchdowns, and that’s a bit of a concern because the Browns are precarious in the secondary for sure. I don’t think we’ll see the shootout we saw in week 2, but I do think the Browns will be sharp on offense. They’ve had to stew about the Pittsburgh game for a week, and want nothing more than to score immediately and silence the critics. For the Bengals, I think it’s going to be tough sledding against the Cleveland defensive line, and they'll have a hard time moving the ball effectively. I like the Browns to win this pretty convincingly, something along the lines of 34-20.

Go Browns.

*Mary Kay Cabot also tweeted out some of the replies from misogynistic, cretinous twitter trolls. These “people” seem to think it is outlandish for a woman to write about football, as if it is a sanctimonious man-space with no room for women. Mary Kay has played the same number of NFL games as these morons, so the claim that “she doesn’t know the game” is baseless and juvenile. The world we live in allows people to hide behind internet anonymity and say the most offensive things with no repercussions whatsoever, and allows these insecure, despicable people to crawl out from under their rocks from time to time.